The 21st Century is rediscovering the profound work of serious thinkers of the 60s. This is the case of Carl R. Rogers, founder of client-centered therapy, developer of a humanistic development process and formulator of a solid philosophy regarding human beings and its implications on everyday life. AsRogershimself acknowledged, the purpose of his work was to share his own experiences. He taught what he had experienced in the jungles of modern social and institutional life, in the largely unmapped territory of personal relationships. The provocative research question was the following: Would it be possible to formulate, in one hypothesis the elements that make any relationship?
The idea was to approach such problems in supervising-supervised relationships, labor-management relationships, executive training encounters and interpersonal relations among top management. The purpose of such a complex exercise was to establish the extent to which psychotherapy applies to human relationships in general. The core argument was that the theory of interpersonal relationships was a fundamental component of a larger structure of theory in client-centered therapy. (I have strongly argued thatRogersis an early pioneer of customer-satisfaction approaches and student-centered pedagogy).
General law relates to a perceived underlying orderliness in all human relationships. This order determines whether relationships will promote growth, enhancement, openness and development in both individuals or whether it will make inhibit growth and promote defensiveness and barriers in both parties.
To better understand this interpretation, the concept of congruence or harmony, is relevant. It points to an accurate matching of experiencing, awareness and communication.
The Rogerian management challenge is how to create harmonious communications in interpersonal relationships. For example:
- Any communication of Cocoto Guillermo is marked by some degree of congruence with Guillermo.
- The greater the congruence of experience, awareness and communication in Coco, the more likely that Guillermo will experience it as a clear communication. If all cues from speech, tone and gesture are unified because they spring from a congruence and unity in Coco, then there is a much less likelihood that these cues will have an ambiguous or unclear meaning to Guillermo.
- The clearer the communication from Coco, the more Guillermo responds with clarity. Even if Guillermo might be quite incongruent in his experience of the topic under discussion, his response will have more clarity than if he had experienced Coco`s communication as ambiguous.
- The more that Coco is congruent in the topic about which they are communicating, the less he has to defend himself against in this area, and the more able he is to listen accurately to Guillermo`s response. Coco has expressed what he genuinely feels. He is therefore free to listen. the less he is presenting a facade to be defended, the more he can listen accurately to what Guillermo is communicating.
- To this degree, Guillermo feels empathically understood. He feels that so far as he has expressed himself, Coco has understood pretty much what he perceives of the topic under consideration.
- For Guillermo to feel understood is for him to experience positive regard for Coco. This is a fundamental dimension. To feel that one is understood is to feel that one has made some kind of positive difference in the experience of another.
- To the degree that Guillermo (a) experiences Coco as congruent or integrated in this relationship; (b) experiences Coco as having positive regard for him; (c) experiences Coco as being empathically understanding is the degree to which the conditions of a healthy relationship are established.
- To the extent that Guillermo is experiencing such conditions he finds himself experiencing fewer obstacles in communication. He tends to communicate more, more congruently and his defensiveness decreases.
- Having communicated himself more freely, with less of defensiveness, Guillermo is able to listen accurately without needing defensive distortion.
- To the degree that Guillermo is able to listen, Coco now feels empathically understood, experiences Guillermo`s positive chemistry and finds himself experiencing a healthy relationship.
- This means that the process of interaction, communication and outcome occurs in each of them, laying the foundation of unity and integration. This simple and profound guiding rule relate to achieving less conflict and developing more usable energy for mature and effective change in behavior.
Copyright 2005 QBS, Inc.